Happiness = Life — Expectations
Elon Musk dropped this in one of his episodes with Joe Rogan, and it’s stuck with me since.
There’s a nuance to the quote I want to talk about before anything else. Expectations are quite necessary in relationship with other people. I’m coaching a young kid who has some social problems.
The other day, he didn’t respond to my texts the same day as we were meeting up. I texted him several times, and an hour after we were supposed to meet, he texted back a “Hi”. So we talked about it the next time we met up, and I told him about my expectations. Especially when things don’t go as planned.
Expectations are hugely important when it comes to building relationships. It’s truly a fuel, since if they’re communicated, voiced and made visible, we can use them to be at peace with one another.
On the other hand
I watched the Apple event yesterday. I’ve watched all of the events for the past couple of years, it’s a ritual and I love seeing them. It makes me feel part of the tribe.
The Apple events are great examples of toxic expectations. I’ve become quite good, overall, with not building expectations up. This time, I was influenced by a Facebook community that I’m part of.
Before the event, I didn’t have any expectation on them releasing anything that I would want. But reading the speculations, I started wondering. And then I started expecting the unrealistic thing I wanted would be showed.
I think the event was one of the best ones they’ve produced in quite some time, yet I was disappointed. Because they didn’t release MY product. Which I for starters didn’t think they would release. It all quickly becomes a shitshow of far too high expectations all misplaced.
The actionable
Living your life without expectations isn’t possible. Because they’re there. So in the cases you can, voice them and make them seen. That’ll create more happiness than you could ever imagine. And in the cases you can’t really voice them to anyone, make sure you voice them for yourself and do what you can to adjust.
It’ll both save you a bunch of disappointment and give you joy.
